Mitt Romney is a fell dragonbeast born in Krakatoa.

14 Sep

Mitt Romney‘s true form.

Mitt Romney was born in the bubbling bowels of Krakatoa‘s molten-hot caldera, following the earth-shaking 1883 eruption of that very volcano, ripples from which were felt all the way in the English channel. This explosion resulted from the climax of the unholy coupling of Romney’s mother, Scylla Black, the monstrous six-headed sea beast of ancient Greek legend , and Surtr, the Norse fire Giant of wrath.

As we can see, his coming was foretold in old Norse poem, theVǫluspá:

Surtr comes from the south
with the scathe of branches:
there shines from his sword
the sun of Gods of the Slain.

One of six heads shown.

So, Surtr ‘comes’ (ejaculates) ‘from the south’ (Krakatoa, Indonesia) with the ‘scathe of branches’ (a metaphor for Scylla Black’s forked tongues); there ‘shines from his sword’ (his penis) the ‘sun’ (read, ‘son’) of ‘Gods of the Slain’ (Romneysaurus’ fell demonic parents themselves, or possibly the Republican party).

Thus has it been written, and so it shall be. In modern times, Scylla Black, having disguised herself in human form to enjoy a lengthy run as the host of a popular TV dating show, now resides in her nest beneath the murky brown depths of the River Mersey.

The volcanic colossus, Surtr, may well be Brian Blessed. As it is, we just don’t know.

Ragnarok is upon us, friends. It is surely all too plain to see, now, why Mitt Romney proudly boasts that Nobody has ever asked to see his birth certificate. He is mocking America, defying mankind to challenge his human credentials because he knows that anyone foolhardy enough to do so will spend eternity in a boiling vat of their own bone marrow.

People of America, take heed of this incontrovertible evidence that voting for Mitt ‘Romneysaurus’ Romney will result in the entire world being engulfed in apocalyptic flame.

What do you think about this, then?

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